I was on the bus yesterday, and I saw a lady who was sitting in front of me. She looked like she was in her later thirties early forties, who looked stressed out. She looks like a Sonja, so let’s call her Sonja. Anyways she was sitting on her seat looking down at her watch, it seemed like she was worried about something. It seemed like she was in a rush to get somewhere because, her clothes seemed like they were thrown on her. Her eyes were big and brown, however baggy. As I was standing there, her phone rang and she was quickly to respond. When she answered she seemed worried because of her tone. It seemed like she was talking to a young boy, maybe her son. She was telling him that she was coming home soon to make dinner, she reminded him not to worry. It reminded me of my mom and how I always call her to make sure that she is alright. I felt sad for her in a way because, it seemed like she was a single parent playing both roles of both daddy and mommy.
She was heading home, because of the phone call and the bags of groceries. As the bus was about to stop, she grabbed all her belongings, however it seemed like she was having a hard time holding the bus. As she thanked the bus driver she got off and headed towards the sidewalk. It seemed like she was happy to go to a place where she could relax and be with people that she loved.
Observation #2
I think her name is Tiffany, because her friend beside her has been calling her Tiff for short. Tiffany has short brown hair, soft and straight. And I'm pretty sure she does to a Catholic school, from the uniform and religious books in her arms. A simple blue ribon in her hair, with a bow on the top, keeps her hair back from being in her face, and allows her bangs to stand out more, and not just blend in with the rest of her hair. Knee high socks, a white shirt and a blue tie, she looks like the kind of girl that follows all the rules in school and at home. Her friend is sort of the same type of person as her, but a bit rebelious, which makes me wonder, if her friends are more on the rebelious side because she wishes she could also rebell from the normal ways of things, and rules her parents and teachers give her. Being carful with her words, keeps her in the middle lane in life, not breaking any rules or being too risky, and not too sharp that life seems a great bore.
They get off the subway, and start to walk down to the next set of escalators. They start walking up, and then Tiffany realizes an old lady wants to get on the escalador, but too many people are shoving her out of the way, so Tiffany moves aside, and lets the old lady get on infront of her, and with a thank you, Tiffany smiles as if she just made the world a much better place, and she is one step closer to world peace.
Tiffany looks like a happy girl, but has the same worries and problems like any other girl.She seems worried because Tiffany is always looking at the clock on the subway television screen. She also seems like a hard working student because of her school bag looking heavy and all the text books that she is holding.
As their next subway comes, they get up fast and stand near the door so they can get a good seat on the subway. Walking away, Tiff looks happy knowing she is just that much closer to being on time for school.
Observation #3-A Person who is Ruining his lungs.
Walking out of my building, I noticed a young man, in his late 20's, sitting on the curb smoking weed. And it just pops in my head, that I have seen this man before, always there, sitting, smoking, so relaxed, enjoying life by the moment, not worrying about anything. So I slowly start to walk away, as he suddenly says hi to me. I say hi back and smile awkwardly, because the look he gives me seems a bit wrong, but maybe because he may be high. His hair is dark and messy, with plain clothes on. His face is pale looking and tired. I know he lives around my area because of the fact that he is always here smoking, for some peace and quiet, to get away from it all. We don't say much to each other, but I can tell he is the kind of person that takes life by each moment, not too many worries. But at the same time, he seems nice, like he has potential to be a nice genuine guy.
I walk back home from Tim's, and as soon as I get back to my building he is still there, sitting, but just about finished his smoke. I get a big wif of weed, and scrunch up my face, turning my head so he wont see the reaction on my face. But he saw my face, and he looked at me for a second and kind of smiled, then says nicely, "Oh sorry, I can tell the smoke is bothering you, here i'm done, i'm leavin now, you don't have to worry." And then I tell him it's okay and that i'll be going in now, and I smile and walk inside.
Free Style
17 years ago

Katherine i enjoyed reading your post.
ReplyDeleteI can actually relate to it as well because i also call my mom to just check up on her.
I think maybe in the future when writing these stories you can try and use less of saying "It seemed as if or it seemed like..". But otherwise well done!:)
I really enjoyed reading about your character but try using better transitional words as appose to commas eg. write: She looked like she was in her later thirties early forties, and stressed out, Instead of "She looked like she was in her later thirties early forties, who looked stressed out."
ReplyDeleteWhat Stephanie and Adela said. Also take yourself out of the story, and edit your writing.
ReplyDelete